My name is Erika. I am an alcoholic and an addict. Alcohol has been my main addiction until I was in an accident. The trusty doctors had me on pain killers for 5 months and took me off without weaning me off them.
Alcoholism runs in my family, on both sides, which was a huge contributor to my disease. When I was a little girl I dreamed of being a ballerina or a teacher and a great mommy, not waking up violently shaking and nauseous every morning. The only thought running through my mind was “is there any wine left,” searching my room and every cup just for a drop. Or looking on the floor to see if I dropped any dope. That’s just not living, I was merely existing.
I was living in a dope house near Ohio Ave and Livingston Ave. where there were a lot of other people crashing there too, all of whom were users too. I was laying down, listening to the mice run and scatter on the hardwood floors, accepting that I was more than likely going to die laying in the same spot, within a month or two.
The shame, embarrassment, self loathing, and pain kept me from being around my family, my daughter, as much as I wanted and should have been.
Two days after accepting my death was near, I got the phone call that saved my life. Leigh Gadek called and told me there was a bed open. I packed my things with a quickness a got out of the hell-hole I was living in.
Since December 7, 2016 I have been in HOPE Recovery sober living. I’ve had a few slips, but by the grace of God and Leigh’s understanding of this disease, I was able to return. Today I have 7 months 2 days clean and sober and am a house manager in one of the women’s homes. It was a long and bumpy ride, but this is the longest length of sobriety I’ve ever had in, well, ever!!! I finally have my life back and I’m in control of it, and that’s a feeling I haven’t had in over a decade, and it’s great!!! My higher power, sponsor, family, house mates, and Leigh are my rocks, who I can count on always to be there in any time of need or distress. My family is amazing and my biggest supporters. They have been through hell and back because of me and my addiction. I’m so grateful they are still by my side.
I work 30 hours a week, spend every moment I can with my daughter and family, am active in my daughters activities and clubs, go to 12 step AA/NA meetings, and help the women in my home!!! I am proud of the woman I am today, and I couldn’t have done it without HOPE Recovery. I’ve tried for many, many years to overcome this disease and was never successful until I found HOPE Recovery.
The structure, stability, hope, encouragement, strength, and accountability these homes provide is remarkable!!! Being able to have other women around that completely understand what your going through helps so much!!!
I plan on staying until I am comfortable and confident to be on my own. I have so much love, respect, and faith in HOPE Recoverys programs and am honored to be a part of it.
Erika J, 31